There are Vegetables in this House

It would be the last time Lucy Silvers found a piece of hair on her freshly steamed broccoli. How Sarah’s long, dark straggly hair managed to land in her dish of vegetable goodness when she wasn’t even home was the final tipping point that pushed Lucy to order the package online. She didn’t even care that it had cost her extra money for the 48-hour shipping and handling. For once in her life, all Lucy wanted was to taste the sweet flavor of revenge. More importantly, she wanted her life back. The life she had before Sarah Smith appeared on her doorstep.

Lucy had always led a life of order. She crocheted on Friday nights, had all her movies alphabetized, pressed and ironed her clothes as soon as they came out of the dryer, and always, always used Q-tips after she showered. She seldom kept in touch with friends from high school or college, but that didn’t bother her. She had been doing fine for years like this, working full-time as a representative for Dean’s food and retreating to her humble home which resembled one of those quaint stone cottages out in the country, except it was in the middle of town - Eighth Avenue of Westwood, Kentucky to be exact. Lucy was content, and wouldn’t torture a soul even if a gun were pointed to her head. That is, until she received that fateful phone call last month in May.

Lucy’s mother was calling as she usually did on Sunday nights (even though they only lived two streets away) to check-up on her eldest child. It was only a couple minutes into their phone-call until Lucy detected that something was wrong.

“…Mom, you don’t sound so great. Is everything okay? Have you visited the doctor since your knee surgery?”

“Oh, don’t be silly, Lucy dear! But now that you mentioned it, there is something on my mind that I wanted to talk to you about.” Lucy’s mom paused before she began again. “Well you know how our new neighbor, Sarah Daniels, who we had over for dinner last week?” Lucy didn’t remember her mom telling her that on the phone last Sunday, but she most certainly recognized the name.

“I think you mean Sarah Smith from high school? She isn’t really a Daniels, is she?” Lucy asked.

“Yes, that’s the one. And sadly no, not anymore is she a Daniels. It was a shame you two were never close friends growing-up,” Lucy’s mom said.

Lucy remembered exactly why she never was close friends with Sarah Smith. Sarah was obnoxious in high school, always looking for a good time and never caring about others except herself. Lucy would never forget the day Sarah had asked to borrow her pen in Spanish class. Being prepared as usual, Lucy reached for an extra pen and handed it to Sarah who was sitting in a desk behind her. The class began to laugh as soon as Lucy felt something sticky on her back. Sarah had written “vaca estúpida” on a post-it, which her Spanish teacher had confirmed meant “stupid cow”. But Sarah being Sarah, of course, got away with it, and let Bobby Daniels, the captain of the wrestling team, take the blame. Bobby and Sarah walked out of class holding hands after that day while Lucy vowed to never speak to them again. Lucy’s mother began talking again, forcing her to snap out of her flashback.

“Well, apparently old Mrs. Peterson hadn’t left the house in the best condition. And I can’t really blame Sarah for doing this, living there now for a number of months and all. So she told us that she was hiring a contractor. She’s tearing down the old screen porch, redoing the driveway, and replacing the water pipes that run through the entire house – the whole nine yards. Anyway, she said it would take a month and really shouldn’t be in the house during the chaos. She asked for a place to stay and I offered your house.”

Lucy was immediately shocked. “But Mom, how could you–”

“Now I know it was unfair to volunteer you without your permission but–”

“You always have such a tough time saying no, I don’t even like–”

“I figured you girls will get along great and besides, it would be more of a hassle if she were to stay with your father and me, especially with my bad knee. It will be just like old times.”

“Mom,” Lucy said, disappointed by her mother’s rationale. “This is not a good idea.”

“Sweetheart, it’s a simple favor and it’s only for a month. If it makes any difference, I think she is a fantastic young woman. I know she recently became a journalist for the Westwood Times. She even runs her own yoga place in town too. She offered me free lessons after my knee heals. It’s the least you could do after everything she’s been through.”

“When is she scheduled to come to my place?”

“Tomorrow. She can stay in your guest room, right?”

Lucy sighed, raising the white flag of surrender.

*****

Since then, Lucy was having a miserable time living in her own house. It was Day 28 which meant Sarah would be out of the house by the time the package arrived. She could only dream of the sweet smell of her violet-scented Febreze which she would spray as soon as Sarah had one foot out the door. Lucy had tried to be cordial and get to know Sarah when she first moved into the guestroom. She had brought up small talk, made cookies, and even helped her unpack. Yet Sarah was quiet through the entire process, only saying thank you once.

Their relationship relentlessly spiraled downhill as the weeks persisted. Though Lucy thought she was confrontational with Sarah’s disasters, Sarah continued to do whatever she pleased. Lucy always felt like a mother picking up after her child. Like the time she found the muffins Sarah had baked molding above the kitchen cabinets because she thought they had tasted gross when they originally came out of the oven. Or another time when Sarah had left the shower drain clogged with hair, and left Maid Lucy to clean it. Or the time Sarah came home and stripped to her underwear and bra right in front of Lucy’s monthly book club before walking into the guestroom. The worst was when Sarah wasn’t leading yoga lessons. She would turn up the music so loud that the walls would shake and make Lucy’s pristine china to fall off their stands doom to crash. Did Lucy get one ‘I’m sorry?’ Not a chance. Not to mention, Sarah had her girlfriends over whenever she could, and always without Lucy’s permission. Still when they were over, which was usually every Saturday night, they simply sat on Lucy’s firm plaid couch watching sitcoms and drinking wine until three in the morning. Lucy couldn’t quite figure Sarah out, but she supposed that’s how Sarah liked it.

During the second week of Sarah’s stay with Lucy, she did something Lucy would never forget yet again. Lucy was decorating her front porch for Memorial Day. As she placed mini American flags in flower pots, she caught Sarah’s eye through the window. She quickly looked away but before long, she heard the screen door open and saw Sarah running towards her. “Take those out,” she said with tears in her eyes. At first Lucy didn’t understand. Without warning though, Sarah began yanking them out of the pots. Lucy objected and tried to stop her, but Sarah persisted and gathered all the flags until there were none left. She went inside, leaving Lucy speechless. When she returned inside though, she noticed the red and white stripes lying in the trash.

*****

Lucy sat on the couch after she had dumped her hair-infested broccoli stir-fry in the kitchen trash can and instead, finished her replacement - a microwavable hot pocket for dinner. She remained in the living room trying to relax while Sarah was gone, putting her feet up on the coffee table. Her laptop rested on her thighs. She caught-up on emails from work while the Food Network played in the background on her flat-screen TV. All the windows were cracked open. The warm summer air was returning for good. The sun set to chirping crickets as the moon said hello to the nighttime sky.

“Another Iron Chef episode done and over with,” Lucy said. She picked up the remote and turned off the TV. She glanced at the clock. It was already 11pm. “Where are you, Sarah?” Lucy wasn’t sure what she had said she was doing tonight after her yoga lesson. Was it belly dancing, karate with her friend Big Mike, or a late night movie? Lucy wondered if she should call Sarah. She was headed for bed soon and needed to lock the door. Sarah had her spare key though so she rationed that it would be fine. Still, Lucy felt bad. Had something happened? Lucy told herself to stop caring about Sarah. She had caused an unnecessary disturbance in her comfortable routine. She started toward her bedroom, leaving on the porch light.

“Lucy!” She heard someone yell in panic while furiously pounding on the door. Lucy turned back. She reached the door and swung it open to find Sarah, nervously hugging the broom that stood outside the front door. But before Lucy could react, Sarah grabbed her by the arm and pulled her out on the porch. She began stomping the porch with the broom.

“Do you hear that?” Sarah asked.

“Do I hear what?” Lucy asked, remembering to sound ridiculously annoyed.

“Those raccoons? I saw them sitting on the steps of the porch when I was driving home a half hour ago after my yoga lesson. I was going to park the car on the curb but decided to keep driving until they left. I’ve been waiting out here for fifteen minutes watching them from the sidewalk until they scurried underneath the porch.”

“Sarah, are you crazy? They are just raccoons,” Lucy said. And so the lecture began. “Even if there were raccoons, I would have heard them. I know I live in town and they come out every now and then, but why would they be sitting out here for that long especially after you made all that noise? You’ve probably woken up the neighbors with the way you just banged on the door.”

Lucy’s thoughts returned to her mother and father who lived two streets down. She remembered her mom had said something about Sarah being a Daniels. Maybe that’s where Sarah was tonight. It wouldn’t surprise Lucy if Sarah had gotten a divorce as young as she was. She searched Sarah’s hand to double check. Sure enough, there was no ring on Sarah’s left ring finger. She put the pieces together. Sarah married Bobby. Sarah divorced Bobby. Sarah now attends group therapy for divorced couples. What other group would meet once a month? Still, Lucy wanted Sarah to confess.

“And not that I really care, but last time I checked your lessons were only an hour long, not three. I was almost going to wait for you to come home and make sure nothing happened.”

Sarah glanced beyond the steps of the porch. Lucy followed her eyes and noticed a tall white plastic pail that wasn’t sitting there earlier that morning. It was scattered fresh produce remains. Lucy glared at Sarah in a way only an angry woman can.

“I can explain.” Sarah said confidently. “I promised the group at our last monthly meeting that I would bring a fresh fruit and veggie tray tonight after my lesson. We always bring snacks, and it was my turn. At my place, I have a compost pile for my fruits and vegetables. It’s one of those healthy living things I like to do, and follows my philosophy of giving back to the environment,” Sarah said. Lucy was still hopeful that Sarah would confess the truth to her whereabouts.

“Anyway, I bought all the produce and a new compost bucket today at the store but I was in a hurry before you came home. I had made the platters just fine and dumped all the scraps in the bucket. I was going to put in my car and drop it off in my backyard before I left so I put it next to the porch as a reminder. Obviously I forgot about it, and you clearly didn’t see it. I didn’t think it would be a big deal, but I’m afraid these raccoons aren’t going to go away unless we force them to leave.” Sarah used the broom and stomped it against the porch’s wooden floor again. Sure enough, Lucy heard a thump and screechy noises coming from below.

“Sarah,” Lucy said, trying to control her anger. “It’s late and I want to go to bed. I’m sure the raccoons are harmless and will leave later tonight. Just be honest with me, where were you to-”

Lucy stopped. She saw the raccoon. Sarah had been wrong. There were not two raccoons in hiding. Instead, only one massive and overweight dark raccoon whose size resembled a fox appeared. Yet for its size, the raccoon was surprisingly quick and leapt from the edge of the wooden porch to the top of the railing. It fearlessly scowled at both of them. Lucy’s heart was beating fast, and could think of only one thing. The broccoli. That cursed hairy broccoli. She was sure the raccoon could smell the food through the screen door of the porch.

“Sarah,” she said in a whisper. “He wants my broccoli.”

Sarah gave Lucy a funny look. She motioned for Lucy to grab something. But what was left? Sarah already had a broom. Lucy looked around and spotted only the flower pot in her midst. “Not my newly planted geraniums,” she thought. Fear forced her to pick up the flower pot as the raccoon sat still before them. He jumped down from the rail and became abnormally close. He climbed on top of the swinging bench only four feet away, still alert to the two women in front of him. He snarled and scratched his nose, screeching.

“Make yourself large and tall,” Sarah said. “And don’t move.” Lucy held the pot in front of her stomach, breathing slowly. She puffed out her chest and stared at the raccoon in a brave manner despite her terror. Sarah took off running along the side of the house. “What the hell?” Lucy thought indignantly. Lucy couldn’t help but think that Sarah would leave her. The raccoon began to crawl closer, inching toward Lucy and ready to pounce from the bench. “Oh no you don’t,” she said under her breath. Lucy took her pot of blooming geraniums and threw it at the animal. The flower pot’s clay shattered against the bench, slicing only the raccoon’s rear leg. Soil, roots, and geraniums lay clumped and broken everywhere. The raccoon had jumped off the bench and was oddly staggering and circling, injured from Lucy’s aim. He was nearing her which left Lucy screaming for help.

Much to her surprise, she saw Sarah. Lucy had been wrong – she hadn’t left her, she had run to get the hose. It was wrapped around her arms, its tail dragging along the landscape of the house. Water was spurting everywhere. Sarah gained control of the mouth of it and placed her thumb in front of it to dispel pressure. She came up the steps of the porch, and stood near Lucy to face the raccoon with Lucy, and sprayed him in the face. “Away!” she said, commanding the raccoon to scurry to a new home. The raccoon limped backwards. Lucy was for once thankful for Sarah and looked at her for help. Sarah stopped spraying the raccoon and stared at the truck that was pulling up near the mailbox. A tall, lanky man slammed its passenger door and ran towards them with a cage in one gloved hand and a syringe needle in the other.

“Sarah?” he asked. Sarah nodded. “You called earlier. My name is Bob. I’m on the Westwood Animal Control Team. My partner who is driving, Ted, is making his way from the truck. You will have to tell him what happened. I’ll take care of this big guy,” he said pointing to the muddled raccoon. The ladies climbed down the porch and watched Bob put the needle into the raccoon. They moved toward Ted who stood in the driveway and gave an account of their interaction with the raccoon.

“How did you know to call?” Ted asked.

“Well, I had experienced something similar like this when I went camping last year with my husband…” Sarah said awkwardly trailing. “He looked dangerous – not like a normal raccoon. So, I called you on my cell phone before I turned on the hose. I was surprised how quickly you guys came.”

“It was the right thing to do. We’ve gotten lots of reports about this guy. It was only a matter of time until we caught him.”

“Thanks again for helping us,” Sarah said. Lucy stood speechless, surprised how well Sarah handled the situation. She didn’t think it was possible that Sarah could do the right thing off the top of her head, or anytime for that matter.

*****

It was late Saturday afternoon. Sarah was gathering her stuff for the move back to her place, and Lucy attempting to be somewhat courteous, offered to help. “So even if the raccoon dilemma may have been your fault, I am actually happy we got that big fella off the streets and into an animal shelter. He would have come back regardless of vegetables or not.” Lucy said breaking the silence.

“Yeah, hopefully they can send him back into the wild when he’s healed,” Sarah said seeming too busy to care. She was sitting, staring out the window, and had been for the past eleven minutes according to Lucy’s mental clock. Did she realize it had been that long?

Lucy moved to the kitchen and began to prepare dinner. She turned on the radio and pulled her ingredients from the fridge. “Hamburgers and fries it is for Sarah’s last night here,” Lucy thought. She retrieved the cutting board and started slicing the purple onion for the burgers. Onions always made her cry. She turned the radio up high, she finally heard Sarah get up from the couch in the living room.

“I’m going to the front porch,” Sarah said. Lucy was curious but forced herself to stop trying to understand. She moved her thoughts to Thursday night again. She had already said she was going to sweep the porch from all the commotion, but hadn’t had time to do it with work and all. She secretly hoped Sarah was moving to the porch to do it for her. After all, it was the least she could do after giving Lucy such a rough time. She returned to her onions though, stopping periodically to swallow the salty tears rolling down her cheeks.

“I have a package for Ms. Sarah Smith,” a male voice said from the front porch. Lucy made her way out of the kitchen and glanced through the screen door. The package. It had arrived in exactly forty-eight hours. Lucy’s stomach dropped. She was surprised how hesitant and scared she felt about it especially since Sarah had recently revealed her sensible side. Nevertheless, Sarah retrieved the package and returned inside. Lucy gave her a reassuring smile, holding back any worry. It was payback for all the things Sarah did to her, and Lucy wasn’t going to let one tiny feeling of remorse ruin it.

“This is so strange,” Sarah said. “This package was addressed to me. I don’t even live here-live here. And there’s no return address on it.”

“Well, maybe you should open it up and see what it is.”

The package was a large flat square box with tape running down all sides of it. Sarah was strong enough though and ripped the tape, opening the package in a matter of seconds. She stared at it. It was still lying in the box. Lucy watched her. Sarah’s face turned from indifference to a knotted expression. Her eyebrows squinted together, her face bunched up, and her cheeks turned red with distress. Tears flooded her eyes and began to race down her face.

“How could you?” she asked Lucy.

Lucy stood flushed. She felt a pain rip in her heart. She never knew a sting like this could exist, especially one that she could cause. For the first time in a long time since Lucy could remember, she had been mean. Silence loomed over the room. The American Flag fell from the box and hit the floor, dead like someone she once knew. Sarah collapsed and continued to weep.

*****

“Mom?” Lucy said, answering the phone that Sunday evening.

“Lucy, honey! How are you?” her mom asked.

“I’m doing okay. Have you seen Sarah yet?”

“Yes, we just saw her today. She said she is going to have us over some time to look at the new additions to the house, and you’re invited to come, too.”

“That’s great,” Lucy said and paused before continuing. “Listen, I’ve been meaning to ask you something since Sarah left.”

“What’s up?” her mother asked seriously.

“Well, it’s just that in high school… This might sound rude of me, but in high school, she was always such a bitch. I never remember her ever being nice to me or anyone for that matter. Not even her boyfriend, Bobby Daniels. Did something happen to her?”

“Oh honey, I thought you knew. Everyone in town knew,” her mom said.

“Knew what?” Lucy asked.

“Bobby and Sarah were married. He passed away six months ago in Bahrain near the Persian Gulf. She just moved back to Westwood.”

Lucy dropped the phone in denial of the facts.