Madison Gay Bars: a User's Guide
Written by Miles VaranaPhotography by Calder SellThere are lots of reasons to go to a gay bar in Madison. Maybe you’re looking for a same-sex hookup. Maybe you’re in the mood to dance, and watching sorority girls stumble around the stage at Whiskey Jack’s isn’t your idea of a good time. Maybe it’s just been a long week, and enjoying a stiff cocktail in a space that flouts heteronormative convention is just what the doctor ordered. In each of these respects, Madison’s gay bar scene has you covered. After conferring with the most credible LGBTQ+ sources on the isthmus, here’s a (highly subjective) list of the best gay bars to maximize your fun next time you go out.The top three:
- Shamrock Bar and Grille
In a town already famous for its garbage-chic dive scene, Shamrock manages to stand out: cheap, friendly, and very, very gay. Unlike Plan B, here you won’t encounter groups of thirsty Grainger guys looking to catch straight girls on their “night off” (although you might end up breaking up a potential brawl outside, as I have.) It doesn’t hurt that the bartenders are cute and the food isn’t half bad. In true dive bar form, Shamrock provides a laissez-faire environment that welcomes not just gay men, but folx from across the LGBTQ+ spectrum.Located on West Main Street between known Madison landmarks Tornado Steak House and Paradise Lounge, you can’t go wrong making a night of it at the Shamrock.Pro tip: head next door after nine to take advantage of Tornado Steak House’s excellent late-night menu, and soak up some of the alcohol in your stomach while you’re at it.
- The Plaza Tavern
Okay, okay, I know. It isn’t technically a gay bar, but come on… The only 100% straight people at Plaza on a given night work for Epic, and they’re not worth talking to anyway. Not only does Plaza have a delicious secret sauce recipe and the highest concentration of manic Sufjan Stevens fans in the galaxy, but you just might get to see the otherwise reclusive celebs of the UW-Madison Memes for Milk-Chugging Teens page in the flesh. While most of the gay bars in Madison tend to be male-dominated, Plaza has a decidedly Sapphic atmosphere. I have it on good authority (my own) that a friend of mine met her girlfriend here.Pro tip: for Lynchian vibes and audible conversation, go on a night that ISN’T Thursday.
- Sotto
The only reason Sotto isn’t higher on this list is the undeniable gamble one takes in choosing to step inside. When Sotto is on, it’s really on: strong drinks, great dancing, and people of all sizes, shapes, and orientations. But the other half of the time, it’s absolutely dead, and you’re out a five dollar cover charge with only a margarita and cacophonous Jason Derulo repeats to console you. It could be the time of your life, or it could be a lonely and alienating experience. Enter at your own risk.Pro tip: take it easy on the drinks here. They have a tendency to sneak up on you.Honorable mention:Woof’sLike leather? Like bears? You’ll probably have a good time at Woof’s. It’s an exciting environment with affordable daily specials. Not for the faint of heart or the vanilla of perspective.Lesbian Pop Up BarsA great way for queer women to hang out with queer women. Check out Dyke Dive or Lesbian Pop Up Bar // Madison Edition on Facebook for more info.FIVE NightclubSure, it’s got dancing, karaoke, and a solid repertoire of drag acts. But is it worth the twenty dollar Uber to get there?Dishonorable mention:Plan BIt’s a popular misconception that Lori Berquam was talking about Mifflin when she said “don’t go.” In reality, she was referring to this place.