I Love the Slant In My Eyes (And In Yours)

[vc_row][vc_column][title type="subtitle-h6"]Lauren Gonitzke[/title][/vc_column][/vc_row][vc_row][vc_column width="11/12"][vc_column_text]Binging on Netflix can be a nice break from studying.But when you’re done with all 7 seasons of Parks and Recreation, it’s time to return to reality. The shows and media you consume [tooltip position="top" text="https://www.thrillist.com/health/nation/is-tv-bad-for-you-how-television-affects-your-brain"]stay with you[/tooltip] in more ways than one. Your brain [tooltip position="top" text="http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-ways-you-dont-realize-movies-are-controlling-your-brain/"]can’t tell the difference between fact and fiction[/tooltip].You may have noticed how people in TV and movies never say “goodbye” when they hang up on the phone. That’s just one of many things about the real world that media alters. What we see on the screen is not reality, but a warped, alternate version of reality, packaged for our consumption.For instance, in Cracked’s Youtube video, [tooltip position="top" text="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vxfht74r2RM"]“5 Childish Mistakes Every Movie Makes,”[/tooltip] the senior editor of Cracked, Tom, breaks down some of the common, silly ways in which the movie world bends certain aspects of the real world. One of my favorite examples was the “nonsense” that people say to bartenders when ordering drinks. Asking for a vodka or whiskey “straight up” is asking for your drink in a glass with a stem. “Straight,” just means not to add anything else in it. The only reason to order a drink “up” is if you want it chilled, so that you’re not holding a cold glass.Another way media warps what you believe about the real world is through reoccurring plots or characters, also known as “tropes.” One of these harmful tropes is the “mediocre guy saves the world” trope. In this trope, though the main character has a more competent female sidekick, he saves the day and receive credit for it because he’s the main character. Vox wrote on this phenomena and complied a small chart of iconic movies in which this trope occurs. The chart includes movies from Guardians of the Galaxy, Star Wars, Harry Potter, and even Inspector Gadget. Women, however more qualified than their counterparts, are merely the sidekicks to the “chosen” male protagonist.The television is not an accurate window to the outside world, but if you grew up using it as one, your world paradigm might be a little skewed. If you grow up not being able to see yourself as a leader, a multifaceted protagonist, a love interest – then it’s even harder to imagine yourself as such after you grow up.As an Asian American coming of age in rural, northern Wisconsin, the only role models I had were Michelle Kwan, Kristi Yamaguchi and Disney’s Mulan. But other than Mulan, these two Asian American figure skaters were not mentioned enough in media for my child’s brain to retain knowledge of their existence. It was a rare and precious oddity when an Asian character was on screen, even more remarkable was when the Asian character was portrayed in a positive or main role. Even as a child, I understood that this was a scarce event. Later on, there was Disney’s Brenda Song in Wendy Wu: Homecoming Warrior, but rarely did I see my racial image reflected back to me – whether in reality or through the television screen.In fact, despite the emergence and increase of visibility in media these days with Fresh Off the Boat, Steven Yuen in The Walking Dead, Master of None, and others, Asian Americans still remain invisible in Hollywood. According to the study "Inclusion or Invisibility? Comprehensive Annenberg Report on Diversity in Entertainment,” conducted by the USC Annenberg School for Journalism and Communication, “…at least half or more of all cinematic, television, or streaming stories fail to portray one speaking or named Asian or Asian American on screen”.In response to the lack of mainstream representation, many Asian Americans turn to Youtube. One particularly popular Youtube channel, Wong Fu Productions, is run by a group of Asian American men who write, direct, and produce short films usually centered on dating and love. Their short film, “[tooltip position="top" text="http://annenberg.usc.edu/pages/~/media/MDSCI/CARDReport%20FINAL%2022216.ashx"]After Us[/tooltip]” follows a young Asian American woman as she recovers from a major breakup. The story doesn’t focus on her ethnic or cultural identity, but she and her ex are both Asian, which is important. That Wong Fu focuses on dating, love and relationships with Asian American characters is significant.Some may say attraction is subconscious, but do you know what else is also subconscious? The insidious ways the media informs what we find attractive. Hollywood tells Asian girls that they should prefer white men to men of their own race. Asian sidekicks are emasculated and/or not given romantic subplots. In the [tooltip position="top" text="http://www.vox.com/2016/4/18/11433378/heroes-female-sidekicks"]words of Junot Diaz[/tooltip], “As a minority growing up, not only are you told that you are not loveable, you are also not the center of the romantic economy. How are we supposed to love others when we love whiteness more than ourselves?”In my small, white Wisconsin town, the highest amount of Asians in my high school was during my sophomore year. There was me, a Taiwanese American girl, and the exchange student that year was from South Korea. After that year, the Taiwanese American graduated and the exchange student returned to Korea, leaving only me.Around me were only white boys, and on the TV screen were also only white men. When I hadn’t wrestled with and confronted my internalized racism yet, I was set on marrying a white man. I eventually learned that no matter what I did, I could not absorb the whiteness of my partner’s identity. . I realized that my desire to be with a white man was reflective of my desire to assimilate, to minimize my racial difference, to erase part of myself in exchange for a shallow sense of acceptance and community.Though they are a different gender, Asian men reflect my racial image back to me. I have hated myself, my appearance – my Asian-ness – for too long. Every time I consciously think and say aloud that I’d rather date within my own race, it is an aggressive act of loving myself. 

Further Reading:

 [1] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iOFI213MuKM [2] https://youtu.be/G-r8HKvkpsE?t=39m47s[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][/vc_row]